


R. I. P.

by sodenoshirayuki_23



Category: Joker Game (Anime)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-14
Updated: 2016-08-14
Packaged: 2018-08-08 18:00:50
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,116
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7767706
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sodenoshirayuki_23/pseuds/sodenoshirayuki_23
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Was it always this hard saying goodbye?</p>
            </blockquote>





	R. I. P.

**Author's Note:**

> Hi, unbetaed. Coz school. *cries*
> 
> I know you're sick of my sakumiyo fics but I couldn't get this off my mind for the whole day.

It was raining hard.

 

The heavy pouring of each droplet caused the streets empty. 

 

 

 

The agency was quiet,  save from the faint sound of the remaining spies playing poker or doing something to kill time.  

 

Sakuma didn't particularly mind if others knew about him and Miyoshi,  which they _are already aware_ of anyway.  

 

 

 

 

"What is this?" Miyoshi looks up to the giver of the red roses that's currently shoved in front of him.  

 

"Who was it again that said I'm not the romantic type of lover?" Sakuma speaks, Miyoshi didn't miss the cheesiness in his tone. 

 

It made the spy's lips quirk up in amusement. "Now, you call this romantic?"

 

Sakuma shrugs,  "I think so."

 

"You really are hopeless." But he takes the bouquet in his hands and takes in the strong smell nonetheless, closing his stunning cat-eyes in the process. 

 

 

 

"I really am hopeless." 

 

The way Sakuma said so resulted to Miyoshi shooting him a look. Sensing that there is more to his lover than just bringing him some flowers.

 

"Are you really leaving?"

 

And Miyoshi knew why Sakuma was being like that suddenly. 

 

"Was asking that to me your only agenda to coming here from the General Staff Office?"

 

"Please just answer me."

 

"Yes."

 

"Where?"

 

"I can't answer that."

 

"....." Miyoshi would have teased Sakuma about how obvious his expressions are or how he's not even trying to hide his emotions that moment.  But that time is just too serious for Miyoshi to even dare to think making fun of. _Or for Sakuma-san,  at the very matter._ This is hurting his lieutenant. 

 

So he didn't.

 

 _This was hurting him, too_. 

 

A few more exchange of glances and subtle _"you-don't-have-to-go"_ and _"please-dont-go",_ coupled with an unusual silence is enough to make Miyoshi sigh.

 

"You are upset."

 

"Of course I am." Sakuma averts his gaze, A fast movement of Miyoshi's own eyes indicate that he noticed how the man tightened his fists. 

 

 

 

 

Miyoshi immediately drops the flowers, making Sakuma turn to him again. 

 

Only to feel Miyoshi's hands cup his cheeks, followed by the familiar sensation he felt on his lips when Miyoshi crashed his soft lips on his.

 

They stayed like that for a minute or so. Sakuma standing there,  and Miyoshi leaning up to kiss him. Which is _new_ ,  because Miyoshi always drags his head down to kiss him.  As if to say, _"Follow me."_

 

But this time,  it's like Miyoshi is _giving him authority,  dominance and complete submission to him._

 

It made Sakuma's face contort in anger,  and of sadness because he knew what this might mean. Miyoshi adds little more force to the said kiss, the former knew the spy is trying to distract him.  He knew what he might be thinking. 

 

Still,  a pain struck his heart because he isn't an idiot;  Miyoshi wouldn't let him think too much, but he also wouldn't do this without any reason.  The spy could be hinting something, but he could also not want Sakuma to realize what it is.

 

Sakuma wanted to ask,  but he knew Miyoshi wouldn't answer.  His lover would only give clues and then he'll have to figure out the pieces like a puzzle.  He has always been like this,  they have always been like this. Although Sakuma doesn't mind,  this time just seemed different.

 

He had a bad feeling about this,  a foreboding, _a premonition_.  

 

As if Miyoshi is saying that he'll give this moment to Sakuma,  because this is his last chance to let this happen.  Because this is the last time he'll be able to give this opportunity to the Lieutenant. 

 

 _Because he wouldn't come back_. 

 

And so without any further thinking,  Sakuma  grabs the shorter man with his strong arms and wraps it around him.  Encircling his lover with a tight embrace whilst deepening their kiss.  A faint gasps comes from Miyoshi, but it was instantly replaced with a tightening of his hold to Sakuma which is now around the man's nape. 

 

The moment Miyoshi's eyes shut closed, Sakuma knew he was thinking of something. And the fact he hasn't shove him away proves that Miyoshi wanted this to last longer. 

 

They both want that moment to last. 

_They both want their relationship to last._

_**They both want each other to be together.** _

 

**But it can't, and they can't.**

 

 

Miyoshi was the first to pull back, and Sakuma is quite surprised when the spy doesn't look at him,  but the ground.  The beautiful man's cheeks are flushed,  and lips still swollen. _He has gone soft,_  or so Sakuma likes to think.  He didn't want to be the cause of the spy's weakness,  but he would be lying if he would say that he was never proud that he's the reason Miyoshi has gotten a little softer.

 

Their panting is only the _faintest_ representation of how they would like to continue this somewhere like they always do, _but they can't._

 

 

 

 **Things can't stay as it as for them**. 

 

 

 

"I have to leave now."

 

 

 

"I know."

 

 

Without a second response,  without a second look,  without goodbyes...

 

 

Miyoshi left. 

 

Sakuma didn't dare to follow him,  he planned to.   _Oh, he planned_.  Though he knows his lover wouldn't want that. 

 

 

And so he left it as it _is_. 

 

As Miyoshi's retreating back can no longer be seen,  Sakuma fishes out something from his pocket. 

 

It's a _small,  shiny velvet box_ containing all the things **_he_ ** hoped they would be.

 

 _A tiny box_ that is the key to how _**they**_ hope it would be. 

 

 

But he let it be, _ **because it should be.**_  

 

 

••••

 

 

**_And how Sakuma regret how it ended like that._ **

 

Because as predicted from what he felt that time,  Miyoshi **_never_** came back. 

 

Protests from the remaining spies and the spymaster himself made it impossible for Sakuma to even say his farewell to what _remains_ of his former beloved. 

 

 

 

He instead,  build a small mound for him somewhere and Yuuki didn't say anything about it. 

 

 

Sakuma assumed it was _alright_. 

 

But it still didn't feel _right._

 

 

 

 

Standing near the supposed grave,  Sakuma could only stare at the empty ground. 

 

 

"Uncle Amari,  what does RIP mean?" 

A little girl voice breaks the silence of the solemn place. 

 

 

Amari hesitated to answer,  as the atmosphere already feels heavy even with just him,  Emma,  and Sakuma there.  It would look too suspicious if anything else. 

 

 

"Emma,  it means Rest In Peace."

 

 

"No." That made Emma,  and even Amari to turn to Sakuma,  whose face doesn't show any visible tears now.

 

But the man's face screams of sorrow,  sadness and longing. 

 

A faint smile spreads across Sakuma's face tired of thinking and perhaps,  crying since he learned the dreadful news. 

 

 

 

"It means, 'Return If Possible'."

 

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry.


End file.
